Even by Aston Villa’s standards, the first game of the new season was bleak. And that’s being generous.
Villa were atrocious against Brighton & Hove Albion on Sunday. At one point, I wanted this column to be a rant about João Gomes getting booked for waving an imaginary yellow card, a rule that hasn’t been enforced for years, after countless players were allowed to do it unpunished at the World Cup.
Instead, Gomes got himself sent off for an offence that can’t be excused and Villa were already 4-0 down. Putting any performance in context is only right and proper but this one stands on its own two feet in a pile of shite. They were woeful.
Still, the away kit looked fantastic.
Here’s your Holy Trinity of match conclusions.